


The Apple of Discord

by Spinafex



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Gen, Nonbinary Crowley (Good Omens), Protective Aziraphale (Good Omens), References to Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, Snake Crowley (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-12 15:15:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29636583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spinafex/pseuds/Spinafex
Summary: Thessaly, 1249 BC.  Crawly plans to crash a wedding.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 6
Collections: Aspec-friendly Good Omens





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Zeckarin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zeckarin/gifts).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to Zeckarin for permitting me to write a story set in their universe! This was inspired by the fic [In Want of Answers](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29118927/chapters/71483004)
> 
> To readers:  
> If you are unfamiliar with Zeckarin's work, I highly recommend it! It is my favourite GO FanFic Series. Their series is called : [And They Were Roomates...(but there were two beds)](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1523585)  
> If you haven't read it, what is relevant to this story is that Zeckarin developed Crowley and Aziraphale friendship in the BC era, they have been spending time together and helping each other out since 3215 BC.
> 
> This story is a retelling of the Greek myth, The Judgement of Paris. However, this is the GO Universe, so humans have interpreted the actions of humans, angels and demons into Greek mythology. For example, Michael would be Ares (War) and Thetis, a sea nymph, is a human in this story.
> 
> For Magethelight: Thank you.

Thessaly, 1249 BC

Aziraphale stood under an ancient fig tree, happily relieving the laden branches of their burden. Gabriel had given him an assignment in the city of Phthia, and on the journey there, Aziraphale had become sidetracked. After storing a few delectable figs into his satchel, the angel placed a small blessing on the tree so that it would be discovered by those in need. 

Halfway to Phthia, he sensed a demonic presence. Smiling at the thought of seeing his frie– enemy, Aziraphale detoured towards a small town on the coast of the Aegean. Aziraphale entered the town and tracked the presence to the town agora. 

Crawly was leaning against a building at the edge of the square. She was dressed in a black peplos with red edging, her long red tresses fashioned into a complicated braid that draped over her shoulder. Aziraphale watched as Crawly’s eyes sparkled mischievously as she watched passersby attempt to pick up the drachmas she had stuck to the ground.

Making his way through the crowd, Aziraphale snapped his fingers, and the drachma a young woman had crouched to pick up was miraculously freed from the cobblestones. 

Crawly turned her head, and, seeing the angel, rolled her eyes in mock annoyance.

“Really, angel?” Crawly complained as Aziraphale stood beside her. “I have a quota to meet.” The tone of her voice betraying her contentment at seeing her friend.

“Well, it is my job to thwart you wiles, my dear.” Aziraphale replied, “Besides, she is filled with fortitude and love.”

“Yeah, no greed in that heart,” Crawly reluctantly agreed, “That one though.” She jerked her chin in the direction of a richly dressed man, looking down his nose at his fellow humans.

“Yes, I doubt I could do anything to change his fate,” Aziraphale noted.

They watched as the man caught sight of another coin, surreptitiously glanced around, and leaned over to pick up the drachma. The man lost his balance when the coin didn’t budge and fell into a conveniently placed pile of donkey dung.

Crawly let out a short bark of laughter, then turned her focus to Aziraphale. “ _Sooo_ …what brings you to Thessaly?”

“I have a blessing to perform in Phthia, apparently there is a great wedding to be held there in four days. The child born to the soon-to-be husband and wife is prophesied to be a mighty warrior. Gabriel sent a missive indicating that it was imperative that the union be blessed.”

“Thetis and Peleus?”

“Oh! You’ve heard of them!”

“Just came from there, I was kicked out of the city for sowing discord.”

“Really?” Aziraphale’s eyes narrowed, “What did you do?”

“Nothing!” Crawly countered, then relented, “I may have tried to smuggle Thetis out of the city.”

Aziraphale’s mouth opened in shock. “Crawly, this marriage ceremony will influence the course of human history! How could you try to break apart the happy couple!”

“ _Happy couple?”_ Crawly seethed, standing to face Aziraphale. “Thetis wants nothing to do with it, she is being forced into this marriage because of some blessed prophecy! She’s being _given as a gift_ like she’s a bloody vase!” Crawly stepped back, regaining her composure, “Besides, I’m a demon, sowing discord is in the job description.”

Aziraphale frowned, “Surely if it’s all part of The Plan, she will be happy?”

“This isn’t about the blasted Plan. Humans are supposed to have free will, and Thetis’s is being taken from her!” Crawly crossed her arms and returned to leaning against the wall. “I don’t get why your lot sent you to bless the marriage anyway. Peleus is definitely one of ours.”

“No one’s fate is predetermined,” Aziraphale countered, “If Heaven has decided this marriage is to be blessed, I am sure this young man can be guided to the side of good. He is considered a hero, after all.”

“Killed half-brother,” Crawly held out her hand to count off as she started listing off Peleus’s sins. “Abandoned wife and daughter, killed father-in-law, dismembered scorned-human, and kept her limbs as trophies.” Crawly’s nose scrunched in disgust, “Definitely bound for Hell.”

Aziraphale pondered for a moment. “Well, there’s nothing to be done. I have orders from Heaven, and you have been cast out of Phthia. Perhaps it is all for the best.”

Crawly looked out into the market, still annoyed by the direction their conversation had gone. Not even watching another human try to pick up a drachma brightened her mood. 

Aziraphale retrieved a fig from his satchel.* The fig was still in perfect condition even after the hours it had spent being jostled around whilst Aziraphale journeyed through Thessaly. 

*Crawly had given the satchel to Aziraphale last time they had crossed paths, and the satchel _wouldn’t dare_ let any of Aziraphale’s possessions become damaged.

Crawly turned her head slightly, watching Aziraphale eyes light up in delight as he delicately bit into the fruit. A plan began to take shape.

“You know, angel. When I was in Phthia, there was this restaurant just within the city. The wine there was sublime, haven’t tasted wine that good since we were in Anyang. _And_ I heard the locals praise this new delicacy the chef invented.” Crawly’s mood lightened as the angel turned his attention to her, interest piqued. “Apparently she invented this layered, flakey pastry and wraps it around goat cheese and some kind of leaf.”

“Sounds scrumptious! I simply must try it when I am there.”

“Not sure you would be able to find it on your own though.”

Aziraphale’s eyes narrowed, “I don’t know what your plan is, Crawly, but you won’t be able to tempt me into helping you.”

“Hmmm?” the demon asked innocently, “M’just trying to repay a debt, I still owe you one.”

“From when?” Aziraphale asked, suspiciously.

Crawly quickly rifled through the memories of her times with the angel, “Harappa.”

Aziraphale sighed fondly, “You realize your influence there will have lasting implications on their culture?”

Crawly grinned smugly, “Yep.”

“You wily serpent. Fine, you may accompany me to Phthia, but only because it will be easier to thwart your schemes if I can keep an eye on you.”

Crawly grinned, “Heaven should be singing your praises for your tireless efforts to protect humanity,”* Crawly replied, without an ounce of sarcasm.

*One day, Crawly would give the white-winged wankers their comeuppance for the way they treated Aziraphale. Heaven’s involvement regarding the Well Incident still irked her.

***

Three days later, Crawly and Aziraphale were happily eating* at Stavroula’s, a tiny little restaurant away from the main thoroughfares.

*Well, Aziraphale was eating. Crawly was quite content drinking a dry red wine that had hints of pomegranate. 

“This is exquisite,” moaned Aziraphale, “Oh, I do hope this recipe endures.”

Crawly watched Aziraphale fondly, “You can always miracle some up if the humans forget how to make it.”

“I’ve tried that before,” Aziraphale replied sadly, “It’s just not the same, miracled food never tastes as good.”

Crawly sipped her wine, “Angel, do you know what the prophecy regarding this marriage says, exactly?”

“Of course. The prophecy states that Thetis’s son will be greater than his father. Heaven believes the son will become a great hero.”

“So, in fact, _Thetis_ is the only one mentioned by name, the father could be anyone.”

“Thetis is engaged to Peleus, it stands to reason he will be the father.”

Crawly let the conversation lull, watching Aziraphale relish the spanakopita. “Would be a shame, really, if you blessed this union, and Peleus wasn’t the father. Might have some backlash in Heaven.”

Aziraphale’s eyes narrowed at Crawley, “What are you implying?”

“Just saying, seems a bit a waste, blessing the union. When all you have to do is bless Thetis and her future children. That way you are guaranteed to bless the son mentioned in the prophecy. Assignment achieved, might even get a compliment if he does turn out to be a great hero.”

“I suppose, even if Thetis is married to Peleus, she is the only one that really needs to be blessed,” Aziraphale conceded.

“Precisely,” Crawly grinned. “Why don’t we both head up to the palace now and you can bless Thetis?”

“I do believe you told me you were prohibited from entering the palace, my dear. I am sure I will be able to manage.”

The demon gave a smug grin, “Whot? You just plan on walking up to a palace guard and going, ‘ _Hello my dear fellow, could you please point me in the direction of Thetis? I am an ethereal being here to bestow a blessing upon her,’”_ Crawly finished in a sing-song voice.

“Well – “

“Thetis has already tried to leave once. The guards will have orders to prevent anyone from seeing her.” Crawly explained. “However, if you were to have a guide who already knew where Thetis is, all you’d have to do is dress so you could move about unnoticed.”

Aziraphale huffed, “My attire is perfectly acceptable.”

Crawly rolled her eyes, “Angel, your chiton is three centuries old and the cut is completely different from what is considered fashionable these days. Humans notice these things.”

“Even if you did come with me, your plan wouldn’t work. Humans tend to notice you as well.” He took a sip of his wine, “What explanation have you given to the people here?”

Crawly’s amber eyes sparkled in delight, “The humans believe I am one of their minor deities. Apparently, a priest followed me after seeing my eyes, and saw me cast a few demonic miracles when I first arrived in Phthia. A few days later, two very nervous guards approached me and said that the King wished to see me that afternoon. When I arrived, Peleus sat on his throne, surrounded by his sycophants, and said he was honoured to be graced with the presence of a citizen of Olympus.”

Aziraphale sighed, though his eyes were filled with amusement, “Babylon and Harappa taught you nothing about the follies of portraying a deity?”

Crawly shrugged, “Deities are always given the best alcohol.* Anyways, it doesn’t matter, You can just carry me in your satchel.” She explained, gesturing to the bag, “No one will notice me, might even take a nap.”

*Except when the mad bastards thought she wanted blood. _That_ misconception was always quickly rectified. 

Aziraphale nodded in agreement, and Crawly relaxed. Once the angel saw Thetis, there was no way he would permit the wedding to happen. Then, Crawly would have an ally to get Thetis out of the city. Of course, stopping a royal wedding would create waves of chaos that would spread throughout the city. Resulting in people being more likely to sin, that was her only motivation. Obviously.

***

That evening, Aziraphale hurried through the maze of interlocking rooms that formed the palace of Phthia, threading his way through the crowds of people preparing for the wedding. After ten minutes, he was hopelessly lost. _Really, they could have learned from the Egyptians how to layout a building._ “Crawly?” Aziraphale asked, nudging his satchel, “Which way is Thetis’s quarters?”

A small black and red serpent stuck her head out of the angel’s satchel. Scanning her surroundings, she replied, “Walk through the door on your left, walk ssstraight for two roomsss, turn right, through the kitchensss, then turn left into a courtyard.”

“And then?”

“Angel, we both know you will be completely disstracted onsssse you enter the kitchensss.”

Aziraphale huffed, then made his way toward the courtyard. He stopped to appreciate the delicacies in the kitchen. However, as he was disguised as a visiting entourage’s servant*, he was quickly shooed out by the cook. With a small pout, he continued without tasting any of the food.**

*Aziraphale thought he dressed as a servant. The humans weren't fooled. However, they’d seen all sorts of people arrive for the wedding, so no one questioned his presence. No point risking insulting a potential foreign dignitary...no matter how oddly he dressed. 

**Neither the cook nor the angel noticed a scaley black tail stretch out of the satchel, snatching some dolmadakia from the table.

Aziraphale and Crawly entered the courtyard. “Now,” directed Crawly, “Head over to the northern colonnade, and go through the sssecond easstmossst doorway. Through there you’ll find a sstairway that will lead you to a corridor. Thetisss is in the fifth room.”

The corridor was full of guests coming and going from their quarters and servants delivering chests of belongings or making last-minute preparations for guests soon to arrive. Even with the throng of people inhabiting the corridor, Thetis's door was easy to identify, as it was the only one with a guard stationed outside of it.

Aziraphale quickly miracled a tray of food into existence.* Approaching the guard, the angel kept his head directed slightly downward and said, “Dinner for the honoured guest of the king.”

*The highest quality food offered in Thessaly. Miracled food may lack the sublime taste of real food, but Aziraphale was not going to summon simple fare. He had standards.

The guard snorted, “My orders state she is only to receive food once every other day until the wedding.”

Aziraphale’s posture instantly transformed from deferent to militant. Left hand balancing the tray as his right snapped downward. 

The guard froze. Aziraphale glanced around, none of the humans noticed anything was amiss.

Aziraphale turned his attention to the heavy wooden door, attention zeroing in on the heavy bronze lock on the door’s latch.

“ _Crawly!”_ Aziraphale seethed, outraged, “You didn’t tell me she was being imprisoned!”

“What part of tried to sssmuggle her out of the ssscity and her being forcssed into this marriage didn’t you undersstand?” Crawly hissed.

“I thought you may have been tempting her to have doubts about the wedding,” Aziraphale answered, “Not… _this!_ ” Aziraphale snapped his fingers again, the lock disappeared, and the door swung open.

A woman with jet black, spirally hair stood up from a chair as Aziraphale entered the room, closing the door behind him. She swayed slightly, but her demeanor was filled with strength and defiance.

“Hello, my dear. My name is Aziraphale, I was here to bestow a blessing upon you and your descendants, but it appears the plan has changed. My fr — acquaintance and I are going to help you escape from this palace, if that is what you wish.

Thetis eyed Aziraphale cautiously and glanced into the corridor behind him. “Your acquaintance?”

Aziraphale placed his satchel on the adjacent bed, and Crawly slithered out onto the blankets. Thetis stepped back against the wall as Crawly began to transform. 

Crawly stood and smiled wryly at Thetis. “Hello, Sea-girl.”

“Eris?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Notes :  
> This fic was inspired by the Greek myth, The Judgement of Paris. Year, places, architecture, etc. referenced accordingly.  
> Food : It's Good Omens, I took some creative license.  
> Anyang – Capital of the Shang Dynasty from 1600 to 1046 BC. China is the oldest known location for the creation of wine.  
> Harappa – Major city (Peak 2600 to 1900 BC) of the Harappan Civilization in the Indus Valley.  
> Well Incident – Zeckarin’s work [Five Times Crowley Groomed Aziraphale’s Wings and One Time He Didn’t](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24118714/chapters/58064578), Chapter 1.


	2. Chapter 2

Thetis bowed her head in respect to Crawly. Looking up, she stepped forward and took Crawly’s hands in hers. “I am glad you have returned, Eris. After the guards separated us, I heard you were cast out of the city, and I feared the other gods may have sought to punish you.”

“Nah, just a bit of a problem with the humans.” Crawly jerked her head at Aziraphale, “I returned with divine assistance.”

Thetis dropped Crawly’s hands and turned her attention to Aziraphale. “Forgive me,” she said, bowing her head, “I did not recognize you as one of the gods.”

“It is quite alright.” Aziraphale consoled, “I much prefer to be perceived as a human than to have people worship me.” 

Crawly rolled her eyes at the angel before turning her attention to the narrow cot. Snapping her fingers upward, the cot reshaped itself into a luxurious chaise. “Humans have given Aziraphale the name Harmonia in some of your stories, Sea-girl.” Crawly explained as she sprawled spinelessly across the lounge.

Thetis looked at Aziraphale in confusion, “The goddess of harmony and concord?”

“We are neither male nor female, in the human sense,” Aziraphale explained. “We merely present as man-shaped or woman-shaped, as the desire strikes us. Crawly, Eris as you know her, enjoys switching forms. Whereas I prefer this human form as it is. It is comfortable and familiar.”

Crawly smirked, “And with his disinterest in human fashion, humans make all kinds of presumptions.”

Thetis nodded, then turned to Crawly, smiling. “Well,” she mused, “I suppose this explains the story of Harmonia and the Serpent.”

Aziraphale sighed exasperatedly, “Humans. Infusing every story with romance. Here you go, dear,” passing the tray of food to Thetis, “you look quite famished.”

“It’s hilarious,” Crawly chortled, “Everyone in this region thinks we’re _married_ and our respective offices are completely oblivious.”

Aziraphale wrung his hands nervously, “Let us hope it stays that way. If word of our acquaintanceship reached them –“

Crawly scowled, her prior delight evaporating.

Aziraphale gestured to the door, “Shall we commence with the escape?”

“How the heaven do you think we’re going to sneak Thetis past all those humans? She’s the _bride_ everyone will know who she is!”

“Of course, I don’t have a plan, Crawly. Until five minutes ago, I thought I was merely here to bless the bride.” Aziraphale retorted, exasperated.

“You’re lucky I came prepared with a plan.” Crawly drawled.

“I suppose we are.”

***

The morning of the wedding, Crawly walked down to the coast to await the wedding celebration. 

Thetis’s father was Nereus, ruler of the Aegean Sea, and tradition dictated that the wedding celebration be held at the home of the bride’s father. Therefore, the morning of the wedding, Crawly walked down to the coast. The city of the wedding celebration was filled with servants preparing for the arrival of the wedding party. Amphoras of wine and olive oil, platters overflowing with food, and rare imports from across the Aegean covered the tables. To the south, a pavilion bedecked with flowers had been set up for the wedding ceremony.

To the north, the morning sun shone down upon a rocky outcrop overlooking the sight. Crawly climbed to the top of the pile of rocks and looked down at the beach. _Perfect._ She shifted into her serpent form and basked in the sun to await the arrival of the wedding guests.

***

Aziraphale sat on the temple steps and watched as the people of Phthia gathered in the city’s largest agora. The citizens gossiped about the royal wedding, scuffles broke out as people jostled to find a place with the best view, and children laughed as they watched the gathering from their parent’s shoulders. Aziraphale watched the humans dotingly, a small smile on his face as he watched their antics. Four small children were playing tag, dashing through the maze of legs. One boy tripped, scraping his leg on the cobblestones. With a quick snap downward, Aziraphale healed the scraped knees before the boy’s concerned sister ran over to help her brother.

Cheers broke out in the direction of the palace. Aziraphale looked up to see the royal procession make their way down to the temple. Thetis was easy to identify from her vibrant red wedding gown, though Aziraphale could not see her face due to the veil. His eyes narrowed as he noted the subtle difference in the attention of the guards. Those around Peleus were focused on the crowd, whilst half the guards surrounding Thetis were focused on her. 

Peleus and Thetis walked up the temple steps. A priest greeted them as they passed the columns of the pronaos, and escorted them inside. Within the temple, the bride and groom would each make an offering* to their gods, asking them to bless their future.**

*When Thetis had asked Crawly if she knew what the gods of Olympus preferred to be offered, Crawly informed her that Zeus would appreciate any human material objects, but not high quality clothing.

**In this case, the bride and groom were asking for _very_ different futures.

Minutes later, the pair emerged, and the crowd cheered. Thetis and Peleus descended the steps and the wedding procession proceeded down towards the beach, where the wedding ceremony would be held that evening, the culmination of a day of celebration.

The crowd began to disperse, and Aziraphale ascended the steps. Upon reaching the pronaos, he rolled his shoulders back and marched into the cella. As he entered, the priestess’ and priests spun around. Ignoring them, Aziraphale strode directly towards the adyton.

“Guards!” a priest called, then turned to Aziraphale, “Halt! Only the most devote may enter the sanctuary.”

Aziraphale paused and _looked_ at the priest. He saw a good soul, one that often attempted to do the right thing. The angel let the slightest trace of his true form shine through, his corporation haloed in light. “I believe you will find that there is a standing invitation for ethereal beings.”

The humans gaped in awe and bowed their heads in respect, stepping away from Aziraphale so he could continue further into the temple.

Aziraphale walked into the adyton and directed his attention to the high priestess. “Hello, I must insist we have a discussion on acceptable marriages in this city and the meaning of consent. Also, I shall require four of your best horses.”

***

The Serpent woke to the ruckus of the wedding entourage descending from the city. Flicking her tongue out, she scented the air. Thetis was amongst the crowd, but Aziraphale was yet to arrive. Shifting slightly, she slid her head over the edge of the outcrop to watch the crowd. 

Assessing the humans, she sought out those she could tempt. The king, the guards, visiting dignitaries, the richest merchants. _There._ From her vantage point, Crawly noted three visiting queens walking together preening at the attention they received for being beautiful and foreign.

Crawly slithered into a more comfortable lookout location. The sunshine was perfect, the heat from the rock was toasty warm, but not scorching. She watched the humans and daydreamed about the great afternoon ahead.

An hour later, Crawly flicked her tongue out, sensing the angel, she scanned the coastline. Aziraphale was walking along the beach from the north. _Right,_ Crawly thought, _Time to crash a wedding._

She slithered down to the base of the rocky outcrop and returned to being woman-shaped. Looking down at her peplos, she considered her appearance. Snapping her fingers upward, thin strings of gold stylized as serpents wove through her hair and the red edging of her peplos became an intricate embroidery of red serpents with golden eyes.

Sauntering out toward the wedding festival, Crawly plucked an apple from an ancient tree. With a quick miracle, the apple turned a burnished gold.

The boisterous atmosphere of the celebration quietened as Crawly entered the wedding pavilion. The humans who knew her as Eris bowed their heads and those who did not eyed her obvious wealth. Crawly noted the location of the three women. She smirked as they glared at her for so easily gaining the attention of the entire party.

The bride and groom stood at the eastern side of the pavilion. Peleus had his back turned to Crawly, speaking with wedding guests. Noticing the sudden hush, he turned. Crawly grinned, her mouth stretching to show her slightly too long canines, as Peleus’s eyes widened, and he motioned to his guards. 

Six guards surrounded Crawly, she assessed the threat, then returned her attention to Peleus. Her composure utterly relaxed. “You’d think, when a goddess forbids a marital union and states that a human is to train as a priestess, she would be _inssstantly_ obeyed.”

Soft murmurs broke out amongst the elite crowd. Crawly noted that the servants swiftly dispersed, recognizing the danger an irate goddess posed, _Well, seems there are at some intelligent people in this city._ After all, an angry goddess was a force to be reckoned with. Conversely, the affluent seemed confident that one woman posed no immediate threat to them, even if she was not human. They merely watched, waiting for events to unfold.

“Instead, I was cast out of your little human town, and the future acolyte was locked away until today.” 

Peleus drew closer, misguidedly convinced he had the upper hand now that Crawly was surrounded. “The prophecy states that the son of Thetis will be more powerful than his father. Whilst the gods may view this as a curse, to mortals, it is a blessing. A king with a powerful heir guarantees the future of a kingdom.” Peleus scoffed, “As a priestess, she could choose to bed whomever she desired. The blessing would be wasted if the son were to be sired by some commoner.”

“You would risk the outrage of the gods because some nutter said Thetis will birth a powerful son?”

“Zeus gifted Thetis to me, his will overshadows any demands you make.”

Crawly scoffed, “I doubt that the wanker spends more than five minutes on Earth every other century or so. I bet it would take a direct order from Her for him to even _talk_ to a human.”

“You may be a goddess, Eris, but your lies hold no power here, we know it is in your nature to instigate strife and discord wherever you go.” 

Peleus put his arm around Thetis’s waist and addressed the crowd, “Upon hearing the prophecy, the gods of Olympus determined to grant the gift of a worthy heir to a great hero. Knowing of the great deeds I had accomplished, and the tragic loss of my dear Antigone. Zeus offered your king this woman to be my wife.” He looked down at Thetis and then dropped his arm, walking forward to better address the crowd. “My son will be an even greater warrior than I, with a loyal heir at my side Thessaly will become one of the …”

Crawly tuned out the rest of Peleus’s drivel, her attention directed behind the king. Aziraphale was at the eastern edge of the pavilion, waiting by an olive tree. Crawly looked directly at Thetis and threw the apple back and forth in his hands. To the crowd, the goddess Eris was merely becoming bored with the king’s speech, but Thetis nodded and turned, discretely making her way to Aziraphale as the crowd’s attention was elsewhere.

As Thetis reached Aziraphale, Crawly sent a quick miracle transforming Thetis’s bridal veil and gown into more comfortable, and inconspicuous, travel attire. Aziraphale and Thetis headed north, and within minutes, disappeared beyond the rocky outcrop.

Crawly turned her attention back to the king, who was still blathering on. “I think we’ve all heard enough,” Crawly interrupted, turning to the crowd, “I’m a goddess, you don’t listen to him, you listen to me.”

“No, they won’t,” Peleus leered, “I rule here, you are nothing.”

Crawly’s eyes flashed dangerously, “Fine, as you are determined to keep your _gift_ ,” she sneered, “I too shall grant this blessed wedding a token.” The Serpent held out the golden apple and walked up to the three queens. She subtly snapped the fingers of her free hand so that the apple hovered before the women. “To the fairest.”

She spun around and sauntered out of the pavilion. “Beannachd leat,” lazily waving a hand in mock dismissal to the king behind her.

As Crawly headed south, raised voices and shouting could already be heard as the humans argued over which city state’s queen was the most beautiful. Crawly grinned, the humans probably wouldn’t even notice Thetis’s disappearance until evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Notes:
> 
> Ancient Greece : Researched marriage ceremonies in ancient Greece, so the portrayal should be fairly accurate. As for worship, not sure how they moved in terms of worship, but from the way people act in the Greek myths, I thought a nod of respect was appropriate.
> 
> Angels and Greek Gods :  
> Gabriel : Though in traditional Abrahamic Lore, Gabriel would probably be closer to Hermes, in GO He doesn’t really act as a messenger, more the guy in charge of heaven. That, plus the lightning at the airport, is why he is associated with Zeus in this story.  
>   
> Beannachd leat – Scottish Gaelic “Bye bye”


End file.
